Lets Get Personal
Back in the summer, I sent a tube full of my saliva off in the mail. Why did I do this? Well, to understand why you'll need some backstory. I am half Japanese on my fathers' side and half American on my mother's, and I grew up in the beautifully diverse Toronto, Canada. Being mixed where I grew up wasn't an anomaly. I was never ashamed about being mixed, but I did have this strange jealousy of the kids who weren't. They had a clear country and culture to be connected to. When you're mixed, culture and country are something you straddle. I see this as a privilege but also as a constant source of questions.
When someone asked me where I was from, I was proud to say Canada. But then when they inevitably followed up with, "No, like where are you really from?" I was always a little confused. My identity is really based on being a Torontonian which means to be a mix of your families heritage and maple syrup. I would reluctantly answer their question and say Japanese and White. I wasn't reluctant to answer their question because I found the question offensive, but rather, I never felt Japanese enough to claim Japan. Sure I spent huge amounts of time growing up with my Japanese family, but I don't speak the language (which was always the next question), and I had never been to Japan. I grew up extremely close to my Japanese grandparents who immigrated to Canada in the 70's. By the time I came around, they spoke great English and had adopted a lot of Western culture. But every meal we ate at their home was still served with miso soup and white sticky rice, and the tv was always playing some program from NHK. They love living in Canada, but I was always curious about the country where they were shaped and which they left. I knew that I would make it a point to visit Japan hoping that through a visit I could better understand my grandparents and my family's history.
Fast forward to now. I've been living in Japan for about two months. Although my family is from Okinawa and I am living in Yokohama, I am still learning so much about what it is to be Japanese. I knew this experience alone would not satisfy my desire to know more about my family's history. That's why this summer I took a DNA test to get a complete understanding of my heritage. I am writing this before looking at my results. When I got the email that the results were in I got a little nervous to see them. As far back as we know my Japanese family is 100% Okinawan, but people move and borders change. There is a good chance my results won't be perfectly 50% Japanese. At first this was hard to accept, but in reality, it changes nothing. It cannot change who I am nor my purpose for being in Japan. While it might change where my great great great great grandparents are from, it does not change where my grandparents are from, and that's why I'm here. They are the most honorable, brave, loving people I know, and to get closer to them I had to get as far away from them as I've ever been.
All that being said, here are my results.
I was correct to think my results would not be 50% Japanese on the nose, but I think 49.9% is close enough.
